Don't have too many don'ts at a time

Don't have too many unnecessary "don'ts" (although you will doubtless have some that you consider necessary and that your child is sure are not).

Don't make rules that you know will only be broken. It's no use, for instance, to forbid necking. You know your youngster will neck after he's reached a stage of bolder interest boy-girlwise. Don't forbid him to talk about sex with other youngsters. He probably will talk about it anyway. Most youngsters do. It serves as a safety valve for letting out feelings that might otherwise take a more hazardous path.

Check yourself frequently:

Do you approve or disapprove when your young one starts going with members of the opposite sex? Are you suspicious or fearful? Do you hold the reins so tight that he wants to break free of them? Are your reins so loose that he misses their steadying effect?

These are hard questions to answer. How you handle the day-by-day details of your teen-ager's dating activities is one way in which you express to him what he can expect of you. How you feel is another. He'll learn from both.

And the repeat of two more important DO'S for you:

Whenever possible talk things over first instead of dictating without discussion. You may need to dictate in the end. But meanwhile the talking will have given your boy or girl a chance to get out his feelings and thoughts.

And: Remember that whether you voice it or not, it's important for you to be able to admit to yourself that he has sex urges which are important to him. Try to bear with him. For one of his great tasks during these years is to find peace with himself on their score.